The Lonely Cicada

When this cicada crash landed in our garden, we could only assume friends and family considered it to be a reject and disowned it. Perhaps it couldn’t sing / chirp in tune.

The poor thing was so disorientated it dive-bombed a tree in the garden, then tried to move into onto the table.

2016-10-04 14.58.06

2016-10-04 14.56.36

So what were we supposed to do? The darn thing wouldn´t budge an inch, wasn´t scared at all and we didn´t want to hurt it. With us two sat either side, it was obviously wondering if we might adopt it. After about an hour or so of it watching us, and us watching it, I wondered if we were supposed to ring the RSPCA? {Royal Society of Cicada Adoption}

To cut a short story even shorter, boredom must´ve set in and it flew off next door, phew what a relief, let them deal with it.      

I like cicadas, even though they´re ugly to look at, the exotic song they sing together is wonderful. But not when it comes from about 10 foot outside the front door and sings out of tune.

Posted in Critters | Leave a comment

Meanwhile Down At The Go Karts Racetrack

When we took Neil to Go Karts Orihuela Costa, I just knew the macho rivalry thing would set in. All our offspring possess a winning streak wherever sport and gaming prowess are concerned. If total success doesn´t present itself, there´s two different modes of reaction:

a) Sulk and make excuses that go on for hours.

b) Much more likely, take the p*ss out of each other for days on end.

When Dave won at both Crazy Golf and Pool, Neil reckoned the Crazy Golf surface was too fast,, and the pool table had recently been re-covered (hence too slow). I mean it´s not like Dave´s been practicing in secret, but all excuses were well justified weren´t they? Hmm.

When our other son Liam heard the news it made his day, and he made Neil PAY by using the b) Take the p*ss method big style.

Basically it´s quality banter fun with points scored evenly unevenly.

But Go Karting was different, the stakes were much higher. Neil was under pressure to impress both dad, mum, and Liam good style. Forget the track being too fast or too slow, oh no, no. The only excuse for not finishing first would have to be pretend engine failure, which still wouldn´t be good enough to prevent a good p*ss take of epic proportions. Probably make it worse!

So here´s a few photos which don´t really prove anything, but the score sheet does.

Ready for the off, Neil fixing the speed governor.

2016-10-14 16.06.46   

Big track with SMOOTH surface.

2016-10-14 16.08.16

Take off.

2016-10-14 16.09.45

Lapping dad.

2016-10-14 16.10.18

…While he was dawdling along counting tyres.

2016-10-14 16.16.00

Neil on a bender.

2016-10-14 16.15.11

Dave in the same place but not in the same race.

2016-10-14 16.15.19

About to lap someone else? Alas it did not happen.

2016-10-14 16.11.09

Past the finish line.

2016-10-14 16.17.57

Who won and lost the race, no surprise there.

2016-10-14 16.21.45


2016-10-14 16.22.37

Ten fastest winners of the day. Neil´s in at number 4 and please note the David at the top was a different David.

2016-10-14 18.33.10

Consequently my David could´ve lied about it and created a family meltdown,, except a 14 second time difference between the two same names sort of tells it all.

Away from the limelight and glory, our son was gracious enough to acknowledge a small factor that had to be taken into consideration. SIZE MATTERS.

Neil´s kart had a  400CC Honda engine.

Dave´s kart had a 270CC lawn mower engine.

No excuses required, except I think he kept that quiet, so now he´s going to need some. He He.

Image | Posted on by | Leave a comment

Our VIP Visitor At Casa Sangria

Our son Neil has been here for an eight day visit, and life in the slow lane suddenly skipped by far too fast. No fuss, no hassle, with several days of quality time together he truly embraced our lifestyle in the sun, then reluctantly got on a plane back to England.

True colours by the Med.

2016-10-11 16.15.33

Dave thrashed us both at crazy golf.


Sat in the back of a convertible.

2016-10-15 14.38.29

Playing pool with dad.

2016-10-14 22.26.53

Father and son.

2016-10-15 19.07.07

Mum and son.

2016-10-15 19.07.59

One day we went for a cruise (by car) further inland round the other side of Alicante. Amazing views but I forgot my phone, no photos. Oh, and we also got lost amidst the mountains. Yes LOST. Well what’s a day trip out worth if there’s no excitement involved? In addition we forgot to pack the climbing gear, tent, and a packed lunch.

I think we were round here somewhere.

2016-08-25 11.34.17

Taken from the plane on our way home from Germany, it´s very different on the ground looking up instead of down. The drama surrounds you, and the road ahead cutting through the mountains appears to just come to a full stop in the distance.

It took us about four hours to finally land on our driveway. I´d highly recommend the particular route we took, except I don´t have a clue where it was. Bet we´d never find it again either! 

Coming up tomorrow: How to lose yourself on a racing track.

Posted in Family | Leave a comment

A Giant Squid Out Of Water

It was a bit disconcerting that while I was sat eating my calamari tapas, this giant squid appeared and hovered over the table:

2016-09-09 20.32.51

2016-09-09 20.33.13

Came to the conclusion it was lost without a sat nav.

2016-09-09 20.32.19

I’ve been trying to post the following info on here somewhere for ages, but haven’t been able to find any relevance till now. Then again is a flying squid really relevant I ask myself? Oh sod it, continue as planned.

Journalist Mode:

a) About the sky,, there´s been no rain here for over eight months, and it´s officially the longest period of time without any for 70 years. On the Costas our drinking water comes from the Med through desalination plants way out at sea. What comes down from the mountains via a canal system is only used for irrigation of crops. Two years running, extra water supplies have had to be diverted into Benidorm at high season, the bums and tits brigade know nothing of it. Water pressure has not changed in our little area, it blasts out of the taps. But we need more desalination plants across the whole of the coast for in future. There´s a big political ding dong going on at the moment about how much it will costa, and where they will be built.

No facts and figures from Mr Google required, thought I´d write about my own experience of something we´ve all noticed recently:

b) About the environment,, to prevent Zika virus invading, valleys and trees have been sprayed with mozzie repellent. Great for us humans, it´s worked very well! Just the odd weak mozzie left can inflict nothing but a little mark that doesn´t even itch, and disappears the next day. However, along with the mozzies, other critters have also practically disappeared. Examples being moths, butterflies and honey bees {latter two of which are almost extinct across Europe anyway} Also on the downside, dive bombing bluebottles seem to be immune, and further up the food chain lizards have nothing much to eat. Not a great fan of them, but we´ve only seen two this year, tiny little things, just skin and bone. Fortunately the likes of cicadas are unaffected, they still sing their relaxing chorus as LOUD as ever.

Less critters also means there´s less sparrows about too, but at least they can fly further inland. Clever little birds, they all left England and moved somewhere warm years ago. There´s more of them than there are parakeets, not seen many of them either. I´ve given cuty sparrows as an example, because they´re the largest population of birds in these parts. Something that seems at odds to that is when the sun goes down, the number of swifts and bats zooming about has gone up. 

We both got bitten by mozzies good style in Germany recently, fresh meat! Thankfully our son and his family are immune. It´s true what they say about mozzies living in the same country as yourself, after a while they leave you alone and focus on non natives. However, don´t be confused, we still get bit here (not been native long enough). The difference now is, we only notice a bite when we SEE it on an arm or leg. The current total being roughly one per week (each). It’s nice to share. Those that have survived are truly puny and frail.

We’re both still wearing several stunning red marks from German mozzies, not a big deal, but it certainly made me think that northern Europe needs spraying as well. Perhaps not doing so should not depend on distance, perhaps sheer numbers should be a deciding factor? Maybe the mozzies in Spain escaped in advance of being zapped because they heard what was about to happen on social media, {free movement throughout Europe}. If that´s the case, us two got payback!

It´s certainly been a new experience. Nothing to do with global warming, yet we´ve observed how eradicating one species of critter can cause a knock on effect in a very short period of time. However, protecting humans from disease and infection obviously has a higher priority. On the other side of the coin I hope the domino effect stops at lizards. The experts here reckon other species of harmless little critters will increase in numbers and fill the gap. But haven´t many of them been killed too? Pause for thought.

This must be but a mere dot on the horizon compared with what´s happening to eco systems from global warming. Nothing much in the grand scheme of things at all. Hasn´t gone unnoticed though.

Posted in Sky | Leave a comment

The Belated Birthday Blog Post

Dave´s birthday blog post. Good grief it was a week ago? October 1st, and what a night!

CAUTION: Romantic photos on display. 

Aside from the birthday itself, day out, meal out, (as per norm on a regular basis) nothing planned, there´s no such thing. Yet it ended up with ten of us boogying on down good style at our local bar.

That´s how it works, none of our friends are in there every night, none of us need to be, but guaranteed there´s always someone we know well and vice versa. A close circle of friends here is wider than in a previous life on the treadmill, and spontaneity is the word. Sorta blows the common idea of all expats being drunk day and night out the water, those people are but a minority. Friendship and a dam good laugh any night of the week is reality. There is no “window in the diary” required.

My own birthday was the same day we flew back from Germany, so I asked Dave what my present was?

Answer: “A plane ticket to Spain,” for most people that would be quite sufficient, well of course it was to me too. It´s always nice going back home to Spain, but I also had Swarovski and the likes of a diamond tiara in mind. So when Dave asked me what I´d got him for his birthday? I told him a plane ticket to England, ha! Payback of the opposite kind.

So after a day of shopping we called in at the bar, and this was the end result:

2016-10-01 23.48.23


2016-10-01 23.47.18

2016-10-01 23.48.13

2016-10-01 23.46.26

Not one to be overstated and all that.

2016-10-01 23.46.45[6]

2016-10-01 23.50.59

2016-10-01 23.50.43

Good mates sat in the corner, us girls were dancing the night away by then.

2016-10-01 23.49.43

The Spanish owners always spoil us on a special occasion, we were given two separate rounds of shots, and a Magnum of Champagne for free!

It was 3am when we got home.

Since then life´s been a blur, getting ready for one of our sons who arrives tomorrow. It´s all worked out that by coincidence, six of us nutters will have 3 sons here at the same time!

And finally, another one of my mum and dad´s expertly chosen birthday cards.

2016-10-04 14.14.04

Right, that´s it, airport run tomorrow in the car with the roof down, night night.

Posted in Party | Leave a comment

Post Brexit Britain Border Control

As you can clearly see, this detailed map of southern Britain is exactly what it will look like when the red line of border control is implemented. This illustration was secretly leaked to me by an architect from the Ministry Of Offence. {MOO}

Still in beta mode, the rocket being fired from just below Wales on the left, will not feature in the finished article.

2016-09-29 19.39.06

Specifically designed to keep outsiders out and,, insiders in. Not only will the Brits be totally cut off from the outside world, dictatorship will command that each citizen spends their annual holiday locked up in Centreparks riding a bicycle across sodden ground.

Note that northern Britain has been completely cut off from the plan. That´s because it´s always been cut off from every plan. Officially known as the north / south divide, it´s also known as the pleb / snob divide. {This pleb here originates from oop north and is witness to it} So where border controls are concerned my compatriots may end up with more freedom! Yess! Just think, a day trip out to Blackpool might go unnoticed by the authorities! No forms to fill out and submit, how wonderful.

Meantime the LONDON government for false promises to ALL Brits sits in the bar at the house of commons smoking weed, being drip fed whisky, while making hilariously nonsense policies. {For which the tax payer foots the bill} “Well, hic, burp, we´ll spew out the lies facts about the latest plan of inaction tomorrow, dress it up with spin waffle and they´ll all swallow it until the next U-turn.”  Thing is, a U-turn nowadays is more like a roundabout, they can turn any direction at any time.

“Heads up Mabel, you´ve just been asked to declare how much rent you collect from your third home, don´t forget to wheel the corked accountant out, he´s stuck on the M25 circular at the moment. Good luck, yours sincerely, the Ministry Of Transport.” {MOT}

So as the plans for battlements to be erected come ever nearer, there´s three small things the Ministry Of Walls {MOW} hasn´t thought of:

a) There´s not enough funds to build it.

b) There´s not enough border staff to patrol it.

c) IF it was actually possible to enforce or reinforce, whatever, there´s a huge possibility it would end up as a flood fence defence and sink. 

Then there´s that corker from the PM: “BREXIT MEANS BREXIT” she shouts it out loud, but even she doesn´t know what it means.

LIMBO MEANS LIMBO is much more appropriate, but she can’t say that because it’s the truth.

Oh my god, I´m so glad we live in Spain where,, well,, there is no government in power at all, and hasn’t been for months. Credit where it’s due, PM Rajoy has pulled this country up off it´s knees in the past few years. But in the second general election after the other one before it {simple terms, there´s been two with the same outcome} he still hasn´t gained the majority vote. Even worse, no other party will join in with him to make a coalition because they´re all not friends with each other. So he´s called “acting” PM and recently won a Spanish reality TV show called I’M A POLITICIAN GET ME OUT OF HERE. Shame really, there was only him in it.

Oh, and there´ll have to be yet another general election too, sometime, anytime will do, no such thing as rush or panic here. There´s even a reality rumour that the third election will be held on Christmas Day. The Spanish aren´t happy about it, so they might go for Christmas Eve instead.

“Mommy, daddy, can I open my presents now please?”

“Well no dear, we have to go to the polling station first, that´s providing there´s no freak rain and the car won´t start.” 

Poor Santa he´d have to work overtime.

I don´t normally do politics, but I´m really enjoying this so I´ll continue with the next political disaster in the making:

Across the pond Mr D Trump is doing a wonderful job of conning half the population into thinking he´s a god like figure who swears a lot, bully´s people, makes racist comments, lies a lot, has no policies, and dodges paying tax on his billions. Even worse, he also wears a very cheap wig that doesn´t fit his big head right, and wants to build (another, but different) wall between Mexico and the USA, AND make Mexico pay for it…

I mean, you really couldn´t make this stuff up could you? Such high class political entertainment from the “decision makers” when world war three is looming on the horizon.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Two Brits In The Sunset

Yes, I´m wondering if I should change the name of the blog to “Two Brits In The Sunset.” Sounds good, but it kind of narrows down available content to about an hour per day, so perhaps not.

Even so, this somewhat limited idea originates from posting many of my own spectacular sunset photos on here recently, {blow your own trumpet Heather} except all credit goes to the sun posing on the catwalk horizon.

So just to shake things up a bit, this post consists of last night´s weather story first. My phone kindly informed me of what was about to happen in advance, top of a screen full of black cloud sat an amber warning for thunder, lightening, RAIN (the brain cell couldn´t compute that one) and, wait for it, HIGH WINDS up to all of 14mph. You read that right, 14mph is the equivalent of gale force here. The temperature still hung around 24 degrees C, but felt like 18, how utterly dreadful is that at 11pm?

Under such extreme circumstances (perhaps one night per year) the Spanish hunker down and mass evacuation to indoors from outdoors occurs. With all window shutters down they unwillingly sit and wait it out. I´ve come to the conclusion they must be allergic to rain. As for cars, well it´s quite obvious they all have rain sensors which means the engine won´t start.

Meanwhile us two twerps sat outside “under the arches” where it´s nice and dry to watch the dramatic spectacle which lasted all of one full hour. {We´re not allergic yet} As the thunder and lightening meandered into the distance it was quite disappointing really, we were hoping for an all nighter. I was even ready to slap a few sandwiches together and bring out a flask of whisky. No chance.

However, it was a thousand times better than watching TV, good job really because the power stayed on but the TV signal went off. Wi Fi survived, but sadly it wasn´t capable of streaming Monty Python on Youtube, (wouldn´t be able to hear it anyway, even with headphones on).

The last time we experienced anything like it was here, September last year, I was stupid enough to venture out on the front terrace in warm rain and take photos of the event. On the upside it meant there was no need for an indoor shower the next day. Oh, and it only lasted an hour that time too.

So is this the start of the big cool down? It´s not as hot as August anymore,, could there be something called “snow and ice” around the corner? Well no, we´re back up to 27 degrees C today in the shade, going up to 28 on Saturday and continuing the theme from the 10 day forecast. At this time of year it means around 32 / 33 degrees in the sun. {Brrrrr}

One of our son´s is coming from the UK to see us for 8 days in early October, no doubt the temperature will be a pleasant shock to the system for him! **Hello Neil, dad´s inside cleaning the downstairs toilet for you, just thought you might like to know that nugget of info. We´re saving the rest of the house for you to do when you get here xxx**

Away from the throne, here´s some sunset photos, from a colourful night last week. All I did was point, click, and swoop the camera round. The outcome: Several different sunsets merged into one sky,, at the same time.

In the distance.

2016-09-17 20.15.22

Closer to the sun.

2016-09-17 20.20.51

Somewhere in the middle.

2016-09-17 20.20.01

2016-09-17 20.15.54

No comparison to the freak alien black of last night!

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment