Fitting new signposts

Now then, for anyone who doesn’t own a boat, the first photo really hasn’t got anything to do with what may, or may not tickle the imagination. (Naughty).

In boring terms it tells us all where to switch the fuel feed off to the engine if there’s a problem, which there never has been aboard the good ship TT. But in the grand scheme of life it’s important to know where a cock is kept…


This one’s all about, well it’s obvious. I mean if ever your batteries need replacing, it’s a good idea to know where countdown to take off cut out is. Best off being reminded not to risk being fried to a crisp whilst faffing about…


If you smell gas, you need to know where this is darn quick, even though we’ve never had to use it. Except when we left her floating on her own for four months, it’s a good idea to shut things down, just like in a house…


Basically, Dave’s spent all day replacing the old brass signposts with these shiny new one’s. I’m impressed, no really, I sat and watched while he lined them all up straight. Shiny new things always look good on a boat, whatever they may be. (Ear-rings, necklaces, bracelets, new shoes).

So what these replacements state quite clearly, is that in order to stay alive and kicking aboard a boat:

  • Make sure any undercover cocks are always turned on, and a fuel supply is available to them. In order to calm things down a little, turn the cock in an anti-clockwise direction.
  • Feeling down? Feeling low? Boost your energy levels with a couple of jump leads and a defibrillator.
  • Unsolicited farting is not allowed inside, if the vents can’t take the fumes and the shut off valve has no signpost, someone could be seriously hurt in the panic to get out to it.

In next week’s informative guide: How to boil a lonely electric kettle when the filament’s been removed…

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